Diana Defries, the Chair of the Movement for an Adoption Apology, had her baby taken away after giving birth at age 16, according to Daily Mail - Home. She was sent to a mother and baby home where she gave birth in an NHS hospital, and at the time, she was young, unmarried, deserted by the baby's father, and had no support, Daily Mail - Home reports. The Education Committee declared that the former practice of forced adoptions inflicted unimaginable suffering on women, though it is unknown how many women were affected in the UK or what specific actions or apologies have been made by authorities. According to Daily Mail - Home, Diana Defries described being treated poorly by staff, with attitudes that were appalling and consistent in tone across decades, and she coped by dissociating due to shame, trauma, and secrecy that made the experience corrosive and damaging. According to Daily Mail - Home, she also noted that talking about it initially is very painful because of feelings of fault and damage.
In a separate tragedy, Deniz Mills' son Aaron, 18, died in January after contracting meningitis B, Daily Mail - Home reports. She now helps fundraise for the Meningitis Now charity, and there is a current outbreak of meningitis B in Kent identified between 13 and 16 March, though it is unknown how many cases are linked to this outbreak or what measures are being taken to contain it.
My baby was taken from me. I dislike the term give up. I think a lot of people are used to that because it's used in common parlance, but it's more honest to say most of these babies were taken from young mothers, including myself.
All of that was sullied by the way I was treated, the attitude of the staff at the home and the staff in the hospital was appalling, and I know this happened to many, many young women. We were treated as if we were pariahs, we were somehow lesser people and therefore deserved a sort of punishment, and it varied through the decades, but it was consistent in tone.
I coped by dissociating. In addition to the shame, there is a secrecy because most of us were told, 'You can't talk about this because it's shameful, so you mustn't tell anyone'. You have the shame, you have the trauma, and you have the need to keep it to yourself so there's no way to process what has happened. I think the best way to describe it is corrosive, it damages one in a very fundamental way. The further you go into life and you realise that other people are just having children and living normal lives, the more you realise this is a terrible thing that you're carrying.
It's very painful when you start talking about it initially because of the shame and this feeling of being somehow at fault and damaged.
It was just devastating. You don't expect to lose your healthy 18-year-old.